My 16 year old stepson moved out on Friday to live with his girlfriend and her grandmother. Apparently life is so intolerable for him at home (with me, his father and his siblings) and he’s so in love with his girlfriend (his first “serious” relationship”) that he has no choice but to move in with her instead of living at home.
He’s spent the last few months making life for his siblings awful – being nasty to his younger sisters, constantly fighting with his brothers and talking to myself and his father with serious amounts of attitude. Anyone who knows me will be aware that I don’t take attitude kindly so won’t be surprised when I say that however he spoke to us he received in return. We got to the point where I had refused to wash his clothes, cook or clean for him because he was giving me so much shit and causing so much grief at home that doing anything for him was more trouble than it was worth.
Anyway, the grandmother of his girlfriend thought it would be a briliant idea to have him move in with them. I rang her and spoke to her about why on earth she would do such a thing as it won’t help resolve the issues we’re all having at home and just give him a way to run from the problems and not deal with them. But, according to her, she doesn’t want them to blame her for not giving them a chance if they split up. Personally, I think she’s a stupid bitch for doing this as the only thing she’s doing is giving them an almost 100% chance of wrecking both their lives.
Of course, people have to learn by their own mistakes but some mistakes should wait until you’re older and more mentally able to deal with the fallout from the choices made. Moving in with a person could become a seriously costly mistake at any time, but for a 16 year old with no job prospects, if she falls pregnant, then his life is pretty much over.
We’ve now stood back and said because he’s 16 we can’t force him to stay at home – and, in all honesty, the atmosphere is much better now he’s left – but there will always be a bed for him here when it all goes wrong. And, yes, I say when and not if.
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